By Lupa
This is an excerpt from Kink Magic: Sex Magic Beyond Vanilla
I am a fetishist. In my experience, most of the material on Western sex magic today is hopelessly vanilla and almost overwhelmingly heterosexual. Oh, for sure, it's effective enough. You can certainly draw up enough energy from the orgasms that result from good head or face, manual stimulation or (as my mate Taylor Ellwood puts it) "in-out, in-out, thrust and a grunt" everyday vanilla sex. Some adventurous folk delve into sexual Tantra, which can definitely heighten both the magical and mundane sex life.
But what about those of us who demand some kink in the equation? Sometimes we just have to get creative. BDSM is pretty obvious; people have been using pain to work magic for centuries. Crossdressing is a good tool for invocation. And then there's narcissism, an obsession with the beauty of the self. That's one of my favorites. I was recently introduced to the use of this particular kink in sex magic.
Can I just say that I love mirrors? I'm vain, I admit it. I like seeing how I look, whether I'm dressed up or down, from different angles. I'll even sneak glances in storefront windows. And, of course, I love watching myself have sex. I've got a twenty-four-inch-diameter round mirror hanging over the head of my bed. It's gotten some good mileage out of it, and it's been a popular toy among my lovers.
I've used mirrors to cast sigils before, though in a different capacity. One memorable ritual involved my drawing the sigil on another mirror of mine and then trying to see my image through it. My narcissism, in a nonsexual context, got the best of me. I got so annoyed at having the sigil in the way of what I wanted to see that I lost my temper and clawed it into a blur of pink smudges.
Taylor and I both love sex magic and use it quite often. We're already crazy about each other, and generate godsawful amounts of energy from our play. What better use for it than magic? We've done quite a bit with BDSM and ritual; generally speaking, whoever's on top ends up directing the energy into whatever purpose we've decided upon. The bottom then ends up being a generator for that energy, having it evoked through pain, sensuality and ritual psychodrama. In this manner the top can maintain complete control of the situation while the bottom is free to abandon hirself to the experience, thereby avoiding any inhibitions that may adversely affect the magic.
So one evening Taylor decided he was going to make use of my narcissism to cast a sigil to benefit a joint venture of ours. He had me design a sigil and draw it on the mirror over the bed. He then topped me rather roughly, drawing out a good bit of energy from me in the process and focusing it into the sigil. This was pretty normal protocol for us.
But then he positioned me so I could watch what was going on in the mirror. I focused on my reflection through the sigil, entranced by my own image and further stimulated by being able to connect the visual image with the touch-sensations I was experiencing. I then saw why Taylor included the mirror sigil this time. I observed, through my libido-raging haze, that the energy we were building not only passed back and forth between us and our reflections, but charged the sigil each time through the mirror. This noticeably enhanced not only the magic itself, but also physical arousal on both our parts. Both the physical and energetic dynamics fed each other, and needless to say the end result was a very thoroughly wiped out bottom and a quite successfully charged sigil.
This is just one example of how one's personal kinks can be utilized in ritual. Fetishes, by their nature, require a great deal of focus even to the point of obsession, and it's a relatively simple task to turn that focus to a magical purpose.
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